VERY MATURE CONTENT AHEAD
I have been with my man for 6 years-- we've broken up once, last year, but got back together in early January. Gen reminded me of an aspect that I haven't been able to talk about with him. I love him, and I am certain he loves me and wants things to work out; but even with our pretend dates-- they almost always end with no "happy ending" for me... as in I haven't had an orgasm for quite some time, let alone a good one; and sex for us is frequent now that we live together. (although right now I am still on holiday back in my home town)
We kiss and he heads to bed while I stay up and continue work in the other room.
We get along pretty awesomely most days, then we have "regular" days where we're in our own little worlds.
When I watched "Date Night" the one guy said this quote about his wife that I think best describes my situation: "We're like the perfect roommates, very very awesome roommates"
Meaning that they get along very well living together despite being strangers.
We're not strangers, but there are just some issues that I can't and don't know how to talk to him about-- once or twice I've tried bringing up the fact that I am not receiving any pleasure from our sex, and he ended up getting really butt-hurt to the point where we'd go for weeks without sex-- he gets very childish when he's upset. Hell I even went out and bought some nice things to wear to try and "perk" things up.
For the most part, it ended the same. I'm beginning to think it's a medical issue... whether it is me or him; I can't feel the urge, and he lasts all but a minute...
Foreplay has literally gone out the window the month before I left for holidays, because his errection didn't keep for very long and it hasn't been able to get my body going, so we almost always have to use lube... otherwise it is too painful for me.
I hate to say it, but it's gotten to the point where I just don't want to do it because of how much it stresses me out to do it-- he still wants it, so now we're both edgy whenever "sex" comes up.
I've tried mentioning going to therapy together for this, but he got very mad at me-- as if I was insulting him.
If any of you have any advise on this, I could sure use the help.
I think I may do the therapy thing but on my own, and see where that gets me... although I haven't the faintest idea of where to start to look for one...